Taurian Couples - The Perfect Communicators

I cherish my Taurians Friends!

I have two sets of Taurian couple friends where in each couplet, both individuals are born under the sign of Taurus... Being around them I don't feel as I normally do - on the outside looking in, a guest, or estranged by one or the other partner.

Instead it is an all embracing sense of belonging, like being part of their sensual/practical/earthy domesticity, both involve me in their non-minimalist, luxurious palatable meals... where nutrition not dieting is the keyword...

There are dogs... children... voluptuous females, intelligent strong men... family values, old fashioned down to earth timeless systems in evidence... and their uninterrupted by modern corruption - value systems remain natural, robust, yet flexible enough to cope with daily pressures.

Now I should add that I have other couple friends who are very much 'opposites attracting'... but this particular article, is about two sets of individuals, both unique in their personalities yet with the same star sign, and energy.

My gratitude to both couples is boundless!

I have probably the keenest sense of comfort, relaxation, well being, intellectual stimulus, creative aplomb and sensuality (by this I mean, all that surrounds the senses from smells, the most palatable wine) around them.

When you walk into their kitchens, you do not feel you are entering an operating room; the kitchen isn’t for show, an accessory to their ‘presented lifestyle magazine’…

The cook books are weathered, the kitchens are designed for the cook, there are jugs with herbs overflowing… a cottage kitchen ensure you are interested in the little bowls of olive oil with various herbs, or the bottles with spicy colours. They remind me I suppose of my mother… practical diligence, skilfully blending the fantasy of food to the practical palate of reality where you are actually eating the same recipe that you see in the pages covered with finger prints that touched jam, sauces, gravies…

When I am with them, it is never a case of predictable sameness… each time I visit it is different, they match my own hosting process. The most interesting, creative menus, with appetizing starters, then a simple but satisfying main course always with some unusual side plate of their latest finds ... Whilst this is being served up they are listening to me, adding to my dialogue, questioning me, really prompting me to think beyond my original idea, one feels entirely enveloped by comforting smells: vanilla, chicken soup, mint, fruit teas... They do not create a simulation of superficial comfort by shop bought candles or boutique flowers. Everything is natural, the flowers are from their garden, almost appearing wild, passionately unruly, the candles may be home-made or from Oxfam, and the tea cups are always interesting...

In other words very much like my own natural uncontrived sense of personal self expression.

The chit chat? Discussions that range from my favourite subject (tactical/strategy) and human behaviour dissection, they really like dialogue, that is obvious!

In all the years I have known these two couples they have never had the T.V on in the background, in their homes, during my visit... instead the art of perfect communication skills... With everything one dreams a meal should provide is in evidence. Both couples as individuals show different directions of interest in my life... Both partners are genuinely interested in my anecdotal reminisces...

How do I make this observation? Well in each case, I can develop a theme, an idea, or do a post-event summary, with one or both individuals. Now I may not finish it and perhaps get diverted to something else… in time they remind me – in other words, they have taken on board my thoughts, allowed some self-analysis of their own, and now they point me back to the statement I may have made and asked what my conclusions were.

What I can say is that having spent so much time with both couples, I realised some significant similarities. In each case, both individuals regardless of which couple I visited would interject, interpose, interrupt softly... intelligently drawing from their own experiences and something that I love... share their own experiences to match mine or empathise with what I am describing... In other words they are not sitting there trussed up in pretences... or holding in their weaknesses whilst attempting to project an illusion of pretences... 'Look this is my perfect world... how are you doing?'

For a start, they know I have a ‘bullshit-reading-radar'... so they do not underestimate my grasping what they are saying or presenting as honest. AND I am always encouraged to read between the lines.

In fact my fit friend Camilla is similar in this respect... She never underestimates me, (she is a Virgo, with the chiselled looks, and golden curls of Glen Close, in Fatal Attraction... Like Glen Close's public personality, Camilla has a similar strong independence with vitality, and enjoys her power over men!).... So questions such as ... 'What do you think, about this, why did this happen, what was it's source, what can be done, what is your interpretation, how do you think the situation will develop... ' is commonplace between us.

Responses such as ‘okay, that makes sense… I don’t understand, what made this occur? But why do you think/feel/believe this was the case?’

An endless line of intelligent enquiry, and truth finding... or soul searching, as well as perhaps a few weeks later, a reflected statement is considered again. They had actually thought about what I said, beyond the event when it occurred or when I presented it to them… Now I do this, but rarely do people return the gift of true listening by doing the same back… So what happened with such and such, or that situation you described, how did it end?

At the end of an evening, there is no polite yawning to remind you to leave… instead their graciousness matches their interest in your presence, and their knowledge of the fragility of human life to be so short lived, that they treat each meeting with the same feeling that this may be the last, so it is special… each time … every time.

When Adele moved with Henry, her last words to me were, ‘we have your room ready for you, anytime…you need to recharge your batteries.’

Georg Flegal 1566-1638 Painted this wine and bread painting...


The first couple are Henry and Adele ... the second couple are Sean and Beatriz (the former have two beautiful Labradors ... the second two beautiful daughters under 8 years old)... In both cases I find that I am able to actually be a happy listener ... it isn't down to me to find the interesting dialogue, or keep the conversation in movement... I am able to sit back and genuinely relax ... what I enjoy is that with both couples, I am almost the child and able to be myself, without any surface reflections of how I am presenting myself...

I mean imagine that you are having a meal with this couple that are so relaxed with each other, that fight happily, comfortably, and make up equally well ... that when you are with them, they are including you entirely, that they switch off their tv, stop what they are doing unless it is Henry, with his dark wit, his sly smile, his acceptance that 'she who must be obeyed, is a free-spirit that has the logic of an artist ... - his other half Adele... He often has to work from home, IT consultancy.

… Or Beatriz cooking like a diva in her kitchen ... she is Brazilian ... fiery, fast, intellectually challenging everyone in her path ... and funny without intention as she has this cute accent that makes me laugh. ... High pitched and direct, she can cut to the quick, hit the issue like batsman, striking hard!

Now, when I am with them here is the interesting thing... I spend more time with Sean when I visit Beatriz... I do yoga classes for him from time to time, and he is supple, agile and has fantastic legs ... He also looks like Captain Birdseye - well a young version.... We share an interest in the dynamics of the workplace, we can discuss, disseminate, dissect for hours some particular detail that we have hooked to... I adore being with them both, he is a hands-on father and he is fully involved with his children.... Beatrix is the fireball in their relationship and he guards her jealously - because he is a passionate soul, his way of explaining interesting subjects is so well executed that I am enthralled to just sit there and listen...

Now there are not many men who can engage my attention with their knowledge because more often, I am attracted to the silent types, strong resilient and thinkers, philosophical types with their own quiet radiance... But Sean is different, his energy matches mine ... he has this wicked little grin where his eyebrows raise and Beatrix loves his butt... She is always mentioning how fantastic his athletic legs are and she has every right to appreciate them!

Now Beatrix is someone who I met through work (she worked for me as one of my team of 8 auditors ... and someone I would loved to have developed further possibly into quality assurance, but it was not to be). She is exciting, in meetings she was fearlessly uncompromising in her diligence in wrenching open a weak fissure with her crowbar and then levering it open and exposing the weaknesses.

I would marvel at her complete lack of subtlety, her avoidance of diplomatic persuasiveness and most of all her clarity in disposing of the fool who dared to take her on... Now I have to tell you she made me laugh ... to the point where my sides would crack and I would have to sit down, because she was so natural, and like a bull in a proverbial china shop, she was driven! I had images of having to put my hand on her forehead to hold her back. ... Whilst she pawed the ground with her passionate Brazilian power! It was easy to live vicariously out of her sheer audacity and mental brilliance, I adore smart women, she is nobody's fool!

Sean ... well he is a master at persuasion; his voice is softly articulated, almost enticing and very elegant. He has a way of describing a situation so clearly that you are in the picture, and he is so forgiving so caring and so sympathetic that you recognise in him someone who is a tremendous manager. He explains himself like a teacher and mentor, and he can hold a conversation to keep me fixed in my chair like a student! In fact that pretty much explains our relationship, I am his pupil because despite his age (he is around 40) he is so intelligent that he keeps my attention span for a limitless time.

One evening he shared his entire liqueur cabinet contents ... whereby we sipped each one of his vast collection ... a teaspoon of each... feeling warm, relaxed ... he knew details about each delicious sip that it was amazing that he had taken the time to know what he was sipping...

He did this without any vanity, ego or need to show-off, he shared in the manner of a vineyard owner who wished you to experience each of his favourite wines with a special pride in the product quality... NOT in any way conceited or suggesting he is special for having acquired such depth of know-how!

My other friend Adele, is a hoot, she is creative in her photography, whereby her pictures of rural roads, winding, through hills, etc. are so beautiful crafted that her eye is faultless in framing a scene ... it is as if she knows exactly what to include in a shot and what should be excluded... She and I get excited about the same subjects!

Now every so often Henry (highly competent, capable and astute) will walk into the room we are in ... He will make some passing cryptic comment (he is one of those strong silent types) and then he will leave the room ... Now Adele and I look at each other ... I raise my left eyebrow, she raises both.. We take a minute to pause, then we realise he has just insulted us NOT superficially but to our core! He is chuckling away to himlself, he admits women are an alien race, he accepts his limitations with them, but he knows how to wind us up... Now we stare at each other, we both burst out laughing ... because we let him, he got away with it, and it took us a few minutes to grasp his deadly aim was accurate, and logic! That is his great weakness he is tooooo damned logical!

Well, we then start to giggle and once we get going it is ridiculous, I mean we both end up crying she has long brown hair usually to her waist silky and brown ... she like Beatriz is a healthy, well rounded curvaceous woman ... they are types that would have been the fantasy of many a Victorian....

Now when she starts to giggle, she has to take off her glasses and wipe a tear ... in the meantime I am practically on my back because my sides hurt so much. Adele is someone whose knowledge of plants, herbs, nutrition, homemaking, my Mother is the same ... but they beat me hands down... I have a wide range of knowledge about most subjects, but if you want to know gardening tips, what food contains, what herbs do she is a young version of my Mom!

For Adele and Henry, their special affinity with their dogs is only matched with the gracious supportive manner in which they treat each other....

One thing I really feel when I am around both of these couples is their ability to include me in their day to day processes ... they both treat me as if I am part of their family, and when they share their anecdotes it is done with such depth of honesty, brutal frankness and humbleness that I feel in awe of how they manage their relationships. If you want to see LOVE in ACTION be around two Taurians ... they are subtle, romantic, sweet, challenging, and down to earth... and most of all they do not PLAY GAMES!

They do not manipulate each other ... they do not have hidden agenda's and they do not treat each other as trophy's or worse still as carers, or providers... Another thing they do not it appears to me require any approval, or verification of love from each other.

They have it within them to know and recognise each other’s hidden language to the degree that it is wordless and when they look at each other, I can feel what they feel for each other.

Their homes are another thing ... they both share equal space in their homes, their goals are perfectly aligned to each others and the give and take is well rounded ... both have spaces to disappear and whether it is animals or children they treat each with the same sense of equal rearing ... there is no subdivisions of labour, or lack of respect for their other half in their demands... Sean lays the table.... Beatriz cooks, Sean opens the wine... Beatriz serves, Sean ensures the children eat, wash and go to bed ... their routines are executed efficiently and guests are part of this wonderful sharing process...

With Adele, she may sit back and (as she is always studying...) Henry will cook, he is a great chef ... he will tease her ... he asks whether wine is desired ... he chooses a wine ... she sets the table, he is involved with the choice of plates, glasses, and sauces.... Around them their dogs play a significant part. … They know each of their animals personal traits, they can read almost to a psychic point their beloved animal's personal unspoken language ... They will each address the needs of their animals with such quick responsiveness and take them everywhere they can ... this closeness is touching and endearing to be part of.

Sometimes when I am alone, I think of them and instantly their coupleness
makes me smile, a slow long smile. They work shoulder to shoulder for shared goals, they build deeper love, committed enduring affection and caring, and they never cut each other with sarcasm, or spite, they do not attack each other ingraciously in public, because their arguments are handled with maturity. I have other friends whose their private battles are weakly unempowering, meant to hurt, where winning is ALL.

These two couples handle each other by direct mature confrontation, assertive and due diligence, they know they are responsible for what happens to them both, and accountable for the results.

They are not perfect, but they do have a sensible desire to work things out to keep their partner in the loop, they have shared goals, and in their relationship they have open communication, nothing festers.

When I worked with Beatrix, she would suddenly look at me and say, ‘Oh that outfit is really lovely, you look beautiful…’ this easy going, sweet confident manner in her to be able to offer the gift of a complement just as sweetly as she accepted compliments was wonderful to me. Adele, is similar when she tells you that she thinks you are wearing the right colour, you know you can believe her, that her artistic eye has fully converted the subtle hues in your skin tone, the radiance that you project from your soul, and her mind can appreciate you artistically, not as a potential female threat.

Both of these couples teach me! That is rare... with them, each time we are together I am constantly learning, engaging in a harmonious circus of skills and power of transformation. You see if you do not know much about signs, Taurians are builders... they are architects...

If you know anything about me, then you know I love architects... they know their materials, and they know their music, their wines, their work dynamics, they know people.... When I want to dissect a person I may care about or be interested in to them, they are non-judgemental. They comprehend my relentless, tireless enquiry; my inner drive and they reach to me, take me into their inner sanctuary and respect my core beliefs.

Dialogue is always try this, taste that. Smell this ... and their descriptive narratives are full of verve, passion, and poetry... and colour!


Georg Flegal 1566-1638 Painted this opulent painting...


Taurians remind me of this quality of opulence, in this painting, their taste is perfect, luxury, in it's simplest form... comfort, quality, humility... even their humblest fare, presented simply whether it is bread, or mulled wine, or slow gin... leaves a mind-blowing exotic, earthy collision of variety, breadth of colour... blood red, burgundy, dark greens... Scents that make your mouth water...

'You must taste this', they say, whilst handling you a spoon with an interesting, colourful edible...

Then the music, they remember I like classical music with my meals that this is part of my nature, my need to feel calm, and they attend to my needs as if I am a special part of their life. Their choice in music enhances my mood, classical; I cannot eat with noisy jazz in the background, it irritates me… They seem to know exactly what I enjoy... it is wordless, I have never had to specify it, and they just seem to know. My mother is the same in this quality, if a song comes on that she knows I would love she stops everything, runs into the lounge, replays the video/dvd, and watches intently - then disappears back to stir her hotpot frenetically, Beatriz is the same.

The one thing that separates them from every other couple I know is that they remind me I suppose of my parents, they have a seductive, sensual quality about them, something that makes you feel you are in the company of naturalness, no ego’s needing massaging, no niggling questions between them of one or the other partner being in power… and both completely at ease with their environment, their chores, and their duty and responsibilities, to those they love, and value which like their material possessions are equally cherished with respect and humanness, you know flaws, imperfections, problems, issues, etc.

I love being around them, they created the words ambience, tranquillity... comfort....

With my sense of romance, had I been a female highway-woman… stealing from the carriages of the affluent, whilst riding into the night... Their homes would have been my haven... a place where one can feel a sense of belonging... and truly a home that looks just like that... not a show home, but a real place to relax... stretch your toes like a cat... and know there is a fireplace and hearth with room for you to rest... a warming brandy, perfect music being a key aspect... and smells from the kitchen where herbs, spices are overabundant...

Taurian's do not do cold clinical... They do flavour... abundance, luxury... richness... and most of all they do generous gentle friendship, one where you feel protected by their irrefutable strength and loyalty to you.

I wish you could bottle what they both have in abundance which is humble goodness ... wit and appreciation of the finer things ... whilst maintaining their down to earth grounded humility!